The world builders of Q.

The World builders of Q.

I'll make Q the earth, the place to be, the place where i am. And i will keep on harping on about my experiences of the world we have created.

A long time ago i beleived in systems, systems to help us, to push us on in the world, help us become something in the world. I still like sytems, but know now that system do not help, they just drive people through at the expense of the people. How do i get to this conclusion, sir Ken Robinson gave a nice TED speach about it, telling me what had known for 15 years. The educational system creates mindless robots, instead of creating creative and worldwise people.

The educational system has become one of checks and balances just as the industrial complex for which it completes the drones. In my first book, The Green House i wrote a chapter about this fallacy. We, our educational system creates mindless drones only interested in living life and dragging themselves to work everyday. In the eevening ending up at the tv-screen because they are tired  and being filled with more wants and needs that are not their wants and needs. I am saying that this form of society is creating zombies, their only thought is about consumption, not the disease but consuming. The zombie only thinks about eating all day, his life is geared to consuming anything that feeds the void that it has become.

It is strange, most of my life i have been driven to become an intellectual, i read all kinds of stuff, watched all kinds of movies i was too young to see, was always in the company of smart people and yet...........these days i am an adult, according to my passport, yes i have one, might i find the need or have the urgency to go off somewhere. I rediscover, what i discovered twenty years ago, nobody grows up. I am not talking about experiencing myself, but what i see around me, it is all play acting, playing parts because all the props are there to play the part. Old William Shakespeare is right and will always be right, the world is a stage and everybody just plays ist part.

Back to intelectualism. I was geared up to become an intelectual, everywhere i went, schools, at the one hand encouraged it and with the other hand discouraged it. I was taught, drilled to give the lesser voices, less intelligent a chance in class. I already taught myself to dumb down my speech, i wanted to be understood, an adolescent wants to be understood, me too. Eventhough i had left my human existence behind me in ninety-eightyfive. My recapitulation while i was a kid had helped me cleanse myself of all bothering stories of my life and now just had to live with the bothering stories of others, the humans around me.

I believed in educating people, humans, so that they could understand what was going on around them, speaking in words they would understand. I still kept reading all kinds of books that fed me, helped me understand the world and the systems around me, the systems i was in.

Being a kid, being a adolescent and a bit to smart for the people around you is a difficult situation. Especially if you are a clairvoyant and a sorcerer and you don't even know it. In my late twenties it started to dawn on me, some one turned me in to a sorcerer and it helped explain some situations. Why people used magic on me, i never used magic and still don't.

I kept being dragged in to all kinds of mindstuff that wasn't mine, it cost me a lot ultimately, but hey i think life itself is the punisher. The so-called big cheeses of the past always get their punishement as they grow up and i saw it to be true. The reason why i see that no one ever grows up, in there is always that little kid, a kid playing the same games it always played and can't help playing them over and over again. Most of us are prisoners of the stories of our lives and some to the stories of their parents and some even further back.

You can see this when you watch people doing their stuff, living their life, acting the parts for which they were not built and/or created.

The world we live in, is one of thought forms. Every system in our world is a thoughtform, the buildingblocks are the thoughts of the humans being part of that system, giving it its power and life. every thoughtform is fed by our thinking about it but the thoughtform itself is like a recording machine. It records all feelings and thoughts of the humans in contact with it. Every thoughtform can be seen and experienced as a bubble of information, it was born once and it will die or be transformed one day. This bubble is the morphologic field Rupert Sheldrake theorized about.

Everything in the world has a field around itself, explaining to the world what it is, humans have a field, a bubble around them, telling us everything there is to know about it. the wonderfull thing about the human beings is, they can change the information in their bubble, change their personal world.  The same can be done with buildings, it only depends on the investment made by the inhabitants of the building. I mean the intent of the humans or beings living and working there. It is very important to know that the intent invested in a building impresses itself on those living and working in that building.

The world is full of spheres of information, every idea, system is a a sphere of information telling those who can see and read it everything about it.

All my life i have been thinking what to do as i grew up, i gave my best everywhere, got shut down everywhere, giving trust and being stabbed in the back time and time again. Do i give up, never on myself, but i do give up on everything else. This society, western society is a house of cards, change is to slow and always comes to late. Generations are already lost when the change is made and all are so spoiled by the garbage of the past they cannot enjoy the new way of thinking and living.

I still do not know what to do with my life, i do what i want and do not care what happens outside the circle that is important to me. Only the arts are giving my life meaning and purpose and evrything else is only a means to my ends. The world has been created, where those with power abuse others to reach their goals and now i am slowly turned in to that kind of animal too. I have seen many abuse their powers because of tehir stories , because they were just power hungry, because of greed. The world creates its own monsters, we do not have to look in other dimensions to find them, the humans are the greys, the draconians and the demons that rip other people apart for the pleasure of it, because of tehir own weaknessess, because of the stories they are playing out in the world.  I have become content with doing nothing, just doing work i don't want to do because i need money and let everything i think is not important slide. I'll take the consequences, i don't care. Why care if the world you are living in does not even acknowledge your existence, only when it needs energy, money and information to keep the machine going.

I am an artist and not allowed to be an artist.

I am a writer and not allowed to be a writer.

I believe in illumination and now i understand why Adam Weishaupt wanted to change the wolrd and even what he wanted to create. I also understand why his plan failed, there is no money in illumination. I have given my life for this goal, i exchanged ambition for illumination and no i do not regret it. It is better to be illuminated than to be a human animal, playing the same games over and over again to get the quick fixes only to get by.

I am living in a world full of zombies, most of them will never get rid of the virus, they love the mindless consuming too much to be healed.

Yesterday i got the idea of the apple again. In a forgotten paradise, man and woman ate the apple of knowledge of all things. Well if those humans are so smart when are they going to act on that knowledge they have. I can imagine what it meant to eat from that apple, to know what to do in every situation, to be flexible and creative and living from the land. Yes it is scary knowing, i have been living with it since i was a kid.

I have reached illumination, was made to fight others and i was never that kind of fighter. I found my way around it, a pleasant and interesting way around it. This world of technologies, industry, dehumanisation, information and also full of magic. When i was a teen i read a lot about magic and being told it did not exist, just wild stories and finding out that it is being used in every segement of society by almost everybody. Me thinking, did we ever get out of the dark ages, i dont think so. The human being never changed, it is still the same animal it ever was, only its tools and toys have been redesigned and imagined tools are being produced right now. The world around you will point out that you are confused but no it is totally different, not you are confused, its the world you are living in, the world is a two faced place, yes a bit of batman. saying one thing and doing the other, i am not playing, yes try to shake this rock and i'll take a big bite out off you, got it !!!

No, i am not angry about anything. I enjoy my life, how fucked up it maybe or strange to those judging me from their rocks in the streams of life. I wish they could see what is coming, the big change and nothing they were expecting. I think that msut be the fear i taste everywhere, humans not being able to play their games as tehy have been doing for two thosuand years, the models don't work anymore, the greed does not work anymore, thinking it does not make it happen anymore. The secret is that there is no secret. Use and abuse anyone you want to get to your goal is the only rule alive in this human world. I am not playing along and when you fight me, i''ll take a big bite out of you.

I have met many natives all over the world, the only real beings or the only ones that deserve the right to be called 'human beings'. I liked them because they were honest, none of them ever lied to me, not that that was or is possible, i never even sensed the thought of lying to me. They taught me about integrity and never giving in to violence, abuse, blackmail and other assorted evil perpetrated on beings living an honest life. They told me many stories about government soldiers, so-called freedomfighters, warlords, loggingcompanies who tried to use their evils to get to their goals. Many lsot their lives in those battles, you can describe these battles truly as battles between the light and the dark. I even helped fight loggers in Brazil with some friends (we blew up some machines, yes i know how to make molotovcocktails), to no avail, but i did. These elders loved it, to speak with a being like me, they did not even care i was was white. They felt my energy, my presence and i was welcome. The old men also laughed about me, telling me that i already knew everything, so why come and learn. To them i was already an old man, an elder. But in our western society those things do not exist, have died out and are not apperciated anymore. Money and worldly power is the only thing that is appreciated in the white, western world and it isn't even important for what it is used.

So, i am also a shaman and an artist and writer and the world shows me it has no need of me. I will sit back, live my life my way, not think about the big machine squeezzing humans till retirement and enjoy the show that is enfolding before my eyes. A world that is disintegrating, changing, transforming in to something else. The change hurts ofcourse, especially to those who do not deserve to get hurt, but hey that is the wolrd the humans created. They are now on course to repeating the same mistakes as the roman empire made and nobody has any sense to study history to understand the systems anymore. They say over and over, we have to learn from the past to not repeat the mistakes from the past and we keep repeating them over and over again. Do humans get killed, does not matter, there are six billion of them, more or less.

I am a traveler, in my dreams i travel all over the world and can act there as if i had taken a plane over there and visit like a tourist. I have been a traveling student for twenty years or so, before that they said i was a bit to young to travel so widely and just focus on my studies at home. In those twenty i made up for the years i was forbidden to travel. I validated everything i read about, experienced everything i read about and lived without a care in the world. I still do and when society calls out to me i say, in the immortal words of Eddy Murphy in the show 'Raw'; 'What have you done for me lately !?'.

Love and light, because i have enough of that to give.